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thought-control

How to Be More Patient

March 3, 2020 by Dawn 3 Comments

Chill out instead of stressing out.

Throughout your day you’ll have moments of waiting.

You’re five minutes early for a meeting.

You’re in line at the post office or grocery store.

You’re waiting for your significant other at the restaurant.

Traffic.

Customer service calls.

At the car shop.

As an athlete, you’ll have LOTS of moments of downtime, between events, weather delays, changes In heats, etc. The better you are at adapting, the better you’ll be able to recover and respond.

Sometimes the waiting can be viewed as an annoyance and you’ll start to feel agitated by the inconvenience. Or, you can see it as a chance to chill for a couple of minutes and it’s no big deal.

If you want to be more calm and less stressed, waiting moments are a perfect time to practice patience. You can learn to keep yourself from getting annoyed, bitter, angry or upset.

When things aren’t going our way or are taking longer than expected, we tend to think that something external is causing our impatience. It’s actually our view of the situation.

When you’re waiting…you have choices. When you start to feel frustrated or impatient, you can use that time and find the opportunity instead.

Here are a few things to try (and if you’re an athlete these practices will improve your mental game).

1. First and foremost, start thinking, “Thank you.”

If you want to squash frustration or annoyance, just be grateful. At the very least think, “This can be a good thing.” Think of the waiting as an opportunity to slow down.

Even if you’re not really glad that you’re waiting, it will help give you another perspective to look at it as an opportunity instead of an inconvenience to your schedule. Consider all of the things that are positive. Then, try one of the following strategies.

2. Practice tuning into your breath.

Try square breathing, 1-2 breathing or diaphragmatic breathing. Heck, just take 5-20 deep breaths and you’ll feel a lot better and the wait will probably be over or almost over. Here are some mp3 downloads to practice.

3. Count.

Sometimes, while standing in line, instead of grabbing my phone and scrolling social media or responding to texts, I’ll just start counting. I’ll play a little game with myself and guess how many seconds it’ll be until it’s my turn.

4. Do nothing and relax any tension in your body and face.

See just how calm you can be. (It’s especially interesting when you realize just how rushed and frazzled others around you are.) Get comfortable doing nothing — it’s good for ya. Often, instead of trying to do something to pass the time, I’ll just be still, maybe even close my eyes and totally relax.

5. Be productive.

If you can tackle something on your to-do list while waiting, it might be a good idea. Or, you may make a list, take care of some things that you’ve been putting off – aim to get something done. Take a deep breath then think of one thing you can get done with the time you have while waiting. Again, you can use that time wisely instead of feeling like it was wasted.

6. Visualize.

Use the time to think through what you’re going to do next, and how you want it to go. Visualize yourself moving with ease through obstacles, winning, taking care of it, and being proud of how you navigate the future.

Bottom line?

Delays can be annoying and frustrating but they can also be no big deal. You don’t have to let them ruin your day or put you in a bad mood. While you’re waiting, you might as well make it worth it. If you can do something productive in the meantime, you’ll feel better about the time you spent. Each of the above practices are better than complaining or getting angry. They’ll help you from getting even more tense, anxious, rushed or stressed.

Filed Under: All Tips Tagged With: awareness, preparation, thought-control, visualization

Best Practices When You’re Waiting

March 6, 2017 by Mentality WOD 8 Comments

 

 

Throughout your day you’ll have moments of waiting.

You’re 5 minutes early for a meeting.

You’re in line at the post office or grocery store.

You’re waiting for your significant other at the restaurant.

Traffic.

Customer service calls.

Waiting for your training partner.

Sometimes the waiting can be viewed as an annoyance, and you’ll start to feel agitated by the inconvenience.

Other times, you’ll see it as a chance to chill for a couple of minutes, and it’s no big deal.

Either way, when you’re waiting…you have choices. When you start to feel frustrated or impatient, you can use that time, and find the opportunity instead.

Here are a few things to try (and if you’re an athlete these practices will improve your mental game)

1. First and foremost, start thinking “thank you.” If you want to squash frustration, or annoyance, just be grateful. At the very least think “this can be a good thing.” Think of the “waiting” as an opportunity to slow the f down. Even if you’re not really glad that you’re waiting, it will help give you another perspective to look at it as an opportunity instead of an inconvenience to your schedule. Consider all of the things that are positive. Then, try one of the following strategies.

2. Practice tuning into your breath. Try square breathing, 1-2 breathing or diaphragmatic breathing. Hell, just take 5-20 deep breaths and you’ll feel a lot better, and the wait will probably be over or almost over.

3. Count. Sometimes, while standing in line, instead of grabbing my phone and scrolling social media or responding to texts, I’ll just start counting. I’ll play a little game with myself and guess how many seconds it’ll be until it’s “my turn.”

4. Do nothing and relax any tension in your body and face.  See just how calm you can be (it’s especially interesting when you realize just how rushed and frazzled others who are around you are ). Get comfortable doing nothing, it’s good for ya. Often, instead of trying to “do something” to pass the time, I’ll just be still, maybe even close my eyes and totally relax.

5. Be productive. If you can tackle something on your “to-do” list while waiting, it might be a good idea. Take a deep breath then think of 1 thing you can get done with the time you have while waiting. Again, you can use that time wisely instead of feeling like it was “wasted.”

Bottom Line? Delays can be annoying and frustrating, but they can also be “no big deal.” You don’t have to let them ruin your day or put you in a bad mood. While you’re waiting, you might as well make it worth it. If you can do something productive in the meantime, you’ll feel better about the time you spent. Each of the above practices are better than bitching, complaining, or getting angry. They’ll help you from getting even more tense, anxious, rushed or stressed.

 

Related:

Sand Flies and Mental Challenges

Impatient? Your Performance Will Suffer

 

Filed Under: All Tips Tagged With: anxiety, body language, breath training, focus, personal growth, self-talk, stress, thought-control

2 Week Cold Water Challenge

September 24, 2016 by Mentality WOD 2 Comments

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The Challenge Specifics

  • Every day for 2 weeks spend at least 3 minutes (I’m doing at least 5) in cold water
  • You could use a cold shower, an ice bath, a natural body of water or whatever. If it’s uncomfortable for you, there are likely some benefits to it, even if it’s just the mental benefit of intentionally doing something challenging
  • How cold is cold? Cold water is really anything from freezing to about 70 degrees – Reference the right side of the chart above – I’d suggest practicing a few times in 55-65 degree water before you go even colder and use caution if you do. When I’ve gone below 50 it is actually painful to touch and it isn’t recommended for everyone

This week I added 40lbs of ice to the tub I’ve been using and it was a legit Ice Bath (pic below) …I hung out in there for 8 minutes working on 4 count square breathing

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The Benefits

  • Top 8 Benefits of Cold Recovery 
  • 7 Health Benefits of Cold Water
  • 7 Reasons Why Taking A Cold Shower Is Good For Your Health
  • The Health Benefits Of Cold Showers

 

My Purposes For Doing The Challenge

  • To increase resilience to discomfort – remembering that it’s temporary, responding with calm thoughts (a form of mental training, hey if I wanna keep coaching this stuff, I gotta keep challenging myself too)
  • To practice remaining calm in discomfort –  focusing on breathing, relaxing any tension, smiling and staying relaxed
  • For fun  – doing something different and a little outside the box
  • To experiment – seeing if I feel any better, studying my body a bit more (pulse, reactions like goosebumps, how long it takes to come back to comfortable body temp), finding out if the benefits listed above are real for me
  • To continue trying new & challenging things as part of my #1MonthExperiment and for the bigger picture too
  • To improve my tolerance for the cold – I had a recent experience with cold water shock while swimming through a waterfall in the coldest water I’ve ever been in (a story for another day)…and although I don’t plan to ever do that again because I learned my lesson, I’d like to improve my tolerance. Now that I live in Southern California where I’m rarely exposed to cold temps, I feel so damn wimpy when I am – my fingertips go numb easily and I’d like to see if I can improve that

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See me in the pic above? Thankfully, I remained calm and was able to recover from the initial shock…though it took almost 6 hours to recover after I got out!!!

Have you ever done a cold water experiment? Is it something you practice? Comment below

If you’re willing to try, tag me in your photos and videos on Instagram

Follow @mentality_wod for my updates on this challenge!

 

 
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Filed Under: All Tips, General Sport Performance Tips, Personal Development, Sport Mental Performance Tagged With: awareness, body language, breath training, fear, perseverance, recovery, strength/toughness, thought-control

Control Anger With 2 Questions

July 11, 2016 by Mentality WOD Leave a Comment

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When you’re getting angry, you’re beginning to experience a strong feeling of or showing annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. Anger will show up in many different ways and can often lead to statements or actions that aren’t so pleasant. You may end up doing or saying something that you wish you could take back.

You may respond to anger by showing aggression or raising your voice, and it could negatively impact those around you.

If your anger boils up at home or work, you become short-fused and unable to communicate effectively.

If it shows up when you’re competing, you may ruin your chances (or your team’s chances) at performing your best.

If you’re quick to anger in a pressure situation, your emotions will get the best of you and you’ll be distracted from your purpose and goals.

Let’s get something straight real quick, feeling angry is not necessarily a bad thing. It’s something we will all continue to experience at different levels. But, responding to the feeling of anger with MORE hostility can be incredibly harmful.

Remember, you are not angry, you are feeling angry. There is a big difference. It isn’t who you are, it’s something temporary that you’re experiencing.

So, next time you begin to feel some anger, ask yourself these 2 questions to understand it so you can manage your response better

  1. How am I hurting right now? Most anger is present as an expression of hurt.
  2. What am I afraid of right now? Anger is also an expression of fear.

When you can understand that you’re hurting, or afraid and that’s why you’re feeling angry, it all makes SO MUCH MORE SENSE. Talk it out, work it out. Then, be kind to yourself (and others) by accepting what’s going on and knowing that it’s okay.

These 2 questions will also help you when you’re engaging with someone else who is acting angry. They are hurting, they are afraid, there is MORE to it than just their hostile words or actions.

Bottom Line: Responding to ANGER with ANGER is not the answer. It won’t make for a positive situation and could really fuck things up for others. Instead, work to understand anger so that you can respond in a more thoughtful, productive, stronger way.

 

Leave your comments below.

 

 

Filed Under: All Tips Tagged With: awareness, communication, fear, outlook, perseverance, personal growth, recovery, self-talk, thought-control

4 Keys To Getting In The Zone

June 6, 2016 by Dawn Leave a Comment

workshop

Flow state. The zone. Those special moments when you feel like you’re able to just let go and do. It’s the feeling of being fully immersed in the activity. You’re able to perform naturally and with ease. You’re totally wrapped up in the moment, and time seems to pause or fall away.

Have you ever been there? Where something just feels spot on? Where everything is clicking and your body is just doing and it feels surreal yet incredible?

“Flow state” is achieved when certain variables all come together. It’s a magical experience and it’s rare to feel totally “in the zone.”

4 Keys To Getting in The Zone

1. Do something you’re incredibly passionate about that really matters to you. This way the activity you’re doing is intrinsically rewarding and you’re receiving the benefits by participating. When you’re excited about the opportunity and enjoying yourself, you’ll set yourself up for a better time. If you’re doing it to appease someone else or because you feel you “should,” it’s less likely you’ll get in the zone.

2. Prep your mind before you start. Remind yourself why you’re doing it, what you want out of it, and what you gotta do to perform well and enjoy yourself. This way your attention is on the variables that matter to you. If you don’t take the time to do this, you’ll find yourself going through the motions, or unfocused.

3. Participate in an event or activity that is challenging, yet doable. Meaning, you’ll want to feel like your abilities are being stretched, but that you’re able to meet the challenge and your capable of doing the task. You have to believe that you CAN do what’s in front of you. If the task is TOO challenging, you won’t be able to let go and just do. If it’s not challenging enough, you won’t be mentally engaged and physically stimulated.

4. Immerse yourself in the process. When your thoughts stray to the past or the future, are you’re able to bring them back to the present? This helps you engage with each moment, one at a time and fully experience the process of what you’re doing…letting go of any pressures of outcome. If you’re feeling pressured about all the expectations you have to achieve a certain “end goal” then it’s unlikely you’ll feel the “flow.”

 

 

When have you been “in the zone?” Comment below.

 
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Filed Under: All Tips Tagged With: awareness, competition, focus, personal growth, preparation, thought-control

The 5 Benefits of Trials

November 30, 2015 by Mentality WOD 2 Comments

Trials are inevitable. We are all going to face challenge, and we’ll continue to have hard times in training and in life. If you’re going through a tough time right now, I hope you can lean into your situation and continue to work through it, knowing that the shit won’t last forever. There may even be some benefits to the trials you’re facing.

This post is to remind you that something good can and may come out of the trials you’re facing. You may not see the benefits immediately, but you gotta hold on to something and eventually pull a positive from it. I hope at least one of these will resonate with you and provide some help.

5 Benefits of Trials

1. Trials can help you create clarity about what’s really important and you can often gain a fresh, improved perspective.

2. You gain experience in handling trials so that you’re more comfortable and confident going through them in the future.

3. You’re given an opportunity to practice many things like patience, perseverance, faith, forgiveness (to yourself and others), stress-management, and communication. There is ALWAYS an opportunity to improve some aspect of yourself.

4. You can improve your relationships by leaning on your support team in trying times. You build stronger relationships when you share your emotions and reach out to those who care about you.

5. You can become a more relatable individual by working through trials and gaining the experience of hard times. You’ll be better able to coach, parent, help, and inspire others by sharing what you learned and how you changed because of the trial.

Of course, if you’re having a hard time, reach out to someone and get help as soon as you can. The trials are going to keep coming, and you can take action daily to improve your mentality so that you’re as prepared as possible to work through them.

 

Can you pull something good out of the storm you’re in? Comment below

 

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Filed Under: All Tips, Personal Development Tagged With: anxiety, fear, optimism, perseverance, strength/toughness, stress, thought-control

A Simple Mental Prep Question

November 18, 2015 by Mentality WOD Leave a Comment

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As part of your mental prep you can ask yourself this quick question

  “What am I looking forward to?”

You may do this before work, before you enter the gym, or before you even get out of bed (which is probably best). You can create a habit of asking yourself this question each time you begin to feel overwhelmed.

We are quick to think about what we don’t want to face in our days. We begin to concentrate on whatever it is that we feel like we “have” to do, and it starts to dominate our thoughts. It’s common to think about pressure, expectations or to-do lists that we have.

But, what if you’re ONLY thinking about what you’re dreading, or all the negative bullshit? Then, you’re constantly feeling anxious, doubtful, or just frustrated with your situation.

Remember, it’s okay to get down, but we don’t want to STAY down. Right?

Each time your mind begins to emphasize a stressor, you can use that as a chance to implement a more beneficial thought.

This practice will help you:

Focus on the positive

Remind yourself of the simple joys

Recognize the opportunities

Become more grateful

Improve your attitude

Stay grounded

Be more optimistic and hopeful

Search until you come up with at least ONE thing you can appreciate and look forward to, even if it’s the simplest, littlest thing.

Bottom Line: Once you’ve created the habit of asking yourself this question, you’ll find it easier and easier to think about all the GOOD STUFF you have goin on.

 

Comment below with what you’re looking forward to today.

Take time to read the posts on the site and follow on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook

 

Filed Under: All Tips Tagged With: anxiety, awareness, outlook, personal growth, preparation, stress, thought-control

Tips From My 1 Mile Open Water Swim (first time)

October 19, 2015 by Mentality WOD Leave a Comment

Occasionally I’ll throw a personal story out there and hopefully you can take something from it.

Yesterday I completed the “Sharkfest Swim.” It’s a 1 mile long course that goes from point A to point B, basically the length of the Coronado Bridge in San Diego.

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Other details

  • I swim regularly in a pool and feel comfortable swimming a mile there, but had never done more than .5 at a time in the open water and that was over 3 years ago
  • I signed up for the event about a week before and decided to just go for it
  • It was 74 degrees out and the water was 75, so I didn’t wear a wetsuit

Screen Shot 2015-10-16 at 3.52.39 PM

  • I kinda disregarded the note on the event website, I trusted that I would be more than okay making it across
  • No, I didn’t have any run-ins with sharks or venomous snakes

My goal?

  • Since this was my first time and I had no idea what to expect, my goals were to
    • a. make it across and
    • b. finish hard so that I was wiped coming across the finish line (I figured that when I had about .25 left, then I would push my pace as much as possible to the finish)

My motivations?

  • To use this physical challenge to grow and improve to better serve others. If I get a little better (mentally and physically) then I’ll be able to help others get a little bit better. Each time we face new challenges, we are given the opportunity to uncover more of our strength.

2009 Enviro Sports Sharkfest San Diego to Coronado Swim

My plan?

  • To have fun and enjoy the environment. To remind myself of how grateful I am to be able to take on challenges, use my body, and play in the beautiful, natural world.
  • To break it down by counting up to 12 strokes at a time. I would breathe every 3 strokes (on average) and once I reached 12 I would glance up to see if I was headed in the right direction. Of course, I fell off of this plan numerous times because of focusing on other things (smacking into people, looking for spots of blue in the sky, thinking about form, reminding myself why I’m doing this, staying grateful, wondering how far along I was), but I always brought my attention right back to the stroke count. Towards the end of the mile I looked up every 6 strokes to make sure I was going in the straightest line to the beach finish.

Some Strategies Used:

  • Embracing the uncomfortable 
  • Bouncing between association and dissociation 
  • Gratitude mental prep 
  • Responding to challenge

It was an incredible event and I can add it to the list of things I never thought I’d do!

What’s next for you? How are you going to get out there and challenge yourself? Is there an event you can sign up for to push your boundaries?

Comment below with your plan.

Start
Finish

 

Filed Under: All Tips Tagged With: body language, goals, motivation, optimism, self-talk, strength/toughness, thought-control

Do You Hate Failing or Do You Fear Failure?

September 14, 2015 by Mentality WOD Leave a Comment

Let the Mexico Drop-04

“What if your view of failure is the thing getting in the way of your success?”

I don’t think anyone really likes failing, but we have to become more clear with what exactly we mean by “failure” and what our expectations are. It’s impossible NOT to fail. You also can’t STOP failure from happening. But, you CAN name it, change your perspective, redefine it and use it to propel you forward. Failure doesn’t have to be ALL BAD.

Could you gain a new, refreshing outlook on failure?

3 Key Steps To Changing The Way You View Failure

1. Instead of the word “failure” use something more positive like “stepping stone,” “learning lesson,” “growth moment,” “eye opener,” or “a way to help you clarify what works and what doesn’t.”

2. When you are anticipating an upcoming event or situation that you don’t want to “fail” in, take 5-10 minutes to identify and specify exactly what would be considered a failure to you.

What would failure be?

What specifically would make you feel like a failure or that you failed?

3. After you’ve defined what exactly “failure” would be to you, write down what thoughts and behaviors you can control to keep that from happening.

What can I influence and how can I stay focused on those factors?

Are my expectations realistic and are they helping me feel confident, calm and prepared? I

How we define failure matters. How we talk about, and think about failure matters.

 

Failure can in fact be awesome, helpful, meaningful, and fun. It’s all about your perspective. Identify your outlook on failing, and understand if your thoughts are helping you or holding you back.

Filed Under: All Tips Tagged With: anxiety, awareness, belief, fear, focus, outlook, perspective, thought-control

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